The Parable of the Wise and Foolish Israelites

THE PARABLE OF THE WISE AND FOOLISH ISRAELITES

Sun. 7-12-2020

By Frank Newton -- Boiling Springs, North Carolina 

 

In the days of Moses, a plague struck the pigs¹ of the Israelites, and their pigs started dying.   Some of the Israelites ate the meat of the pigs who had died of the plague, because they had no other meat.  But some of the Israelites who ate the meat of the plagued pigs died.  So Moses (who was the chief health officer of his people) decreed that the Israelites should stop eating pigs.

 

The next thing that happened was the Israelites split into two groups.  One group was of the opinion that the decree of Moses concerning the pigs was wise, and they obeyed it.  The other group (who followed a false prophet named the Jackal) was of the opinion that Moses was an idiot, and they kept on eating pigs. 

 

Some of the ones who continued eating pigs died, but others of them lived to a ripe old age.  Statistically speaking, though, the Israelites who thought that Moses was wise, and obeyed him, had better health outcomes.

 

One Israelite had just bought one hundred pigs from a passing Midianite, before Moses announced his decree.  This Israelite was very unhappy about Moses' decree, because he had invested a chunk of his substance in the pigs.

 

[At this point, the two manuscripts of the Parable diverge.  Here, we will translate each manuscript separately.]

 

Manuscript Alpha says:

 

He went to Moses and protested, but Moses told him to kill all his pigs.

 

Manuscript Omega says:

 

He went to Moses and protested, so Moses advised him to sell the pigs to the Egyptians.  Everybody was happy except the Egyptians.

 

[From this point on, "Alpha" and "Omega" have the same wording.]

 

In the fullness of time, after a lot of people and a lot of pigs had died, the plague died down.  And when Moses was well stricken in years, he died.  Also, one by one all the people who had strong opinions about whether Moses was a wise man or an idiot died.  After that, some Israelites were ready to forget the whole thing, but the people who took an interest in dead people decided that Moses was a wise man, and they confirmed his decree.  So even unto this day, the Israelites will not eat pigs.

 

¹ An earlier translation calls them "the hogs." Some experts believe that, in the days of King James, this word was pronounced "hawgs."